new process oriented systems

before I forget it ...

I had a session at GEM http://www.energiemedizin.cc/ in Vienna with my friend Gabriele this week. As always it was on the edge with lots of new stuff coming in. This time it was about systems. All the existing systems on earth are rigid and square built on conformity. The problem is - my problem with that kind of system is - the conformity. It is not voluntary but obligatory. Even obligatory wouldn't be so bad if there were similar beings in that system, but our systems here on earth always include totally different beings inside each of those rigid systems of conformity. The best picture I can come up with is an army of soldiers walking. That kind of conformity. Same rhythm, same foot, same space to the front man and back man, same clothes, SAME EVERYTHING ... same personality, same issues, same dough, same mold, cut with the same cookie cutter.

square "dead" conformity

  

IT HURTS.

The pressure on me hurts, but also the forced dealing with issues that are not mine but belong to someone else in that system hurts. In essense it means, all people in that system can only move or develop together. If one stays, everyone stays. If one gets stuck, everyone gets stuck, until you can get that one stuck person unstuck. That is what square feels like to me. There is no flexibility, no space for movement. There is always this kind of force involved and frustration on my part.

The NEW systems work completely different. There is nothing rigid in them. They are process oriented and flexible. There is freedom for everyone. If I take the picture of the soldiers from before, this time everyone walks in his own speed and rhythm and step length, space to front or back or side person is totally different, everyone wears what they like to wear, NOTHING SAME ... different personality, different issues, different dough, different mold, no cookie cutter to cut but everyone cut into a different shape.  CHAOS ... that's what this system looks like.

flexible "living" chaos

RELIEF IS WHAT I FEEL.

This system supports individuality. It supports integrity, authenticity, diversity and creativity. Furthermore this process oriented system supports self expression and self responsibility. It is just not possible to play victim and give power away to another or the system per se. This system wont tell you who you are and who you have to be. This system does not take into account what was in the past or will be in the future. It is totally and only focussed in the present, in the here and now.

diversity - integrity - self expression

Well, I made my choice. I didn't even have to think about it. The new process oriented flexible system is it for me!

I hope I'll see you there :-)

Nalini Singh - one question

before I forget it ...

if I could ask Nalini Singh one question, what would it be?

There is one thing that I am really curious about.

The Psy/changeling series consists of 13 novels so far, number 14 is being written now, and some novellas too.

How much is strategy and planning ahead and how much is writer's instinct and intuition?

Here is my example:
Kaleb Krychek is the male hero of Heart of Obsidian - book 13.

Nalini Singh - Heart of Obsidian

Kaleb first appears in Visions of Heat - book 2 as Faith's competitor for the Psy Council position. He is mentioned as a young ruthless cardinal who rises through the Council structure very fast and becomes Councilor at the end of book 2. Then he appears throughout all the other books as all Councilors appear throughout all or most books.
Sahara is also mentioned briefly in book 2 in context with Faith's Net dropout and increasing her forecasting prize to set up a fund for those who disappeared like her cousin Sahara.

As both are mentioned first in Visions of Heat I theorize that Nalini had some kind of idea for those two from the beginning. It's just as possible that they both were side characters to further the story and give it enough background with no connection or any other thoughts in mind.

So, that is my question. Does she have a story (past, present, future) in mind for all characters who appear in the books, even minor? Or do they develop their own life throughout the story and develop from minor side character to main character with their own book? Or maybe both, some knowing ahead and some development throughout?

 --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

little happy things

before I forget it ...

as I am sitting here having my breakfast coffee, I thought about the coffee in connection with happy things. So let's talk about happy things while I sip my coffee. Alas, you can get yourself one too (or a tea) while you read about my happy and hopefully think about your own happy :-)

native creative hack - original: flow magazine

hm? happy things or happy times? or just happy?
for this post let's stay with the little things, that make us happy. Like some knicknack that makes us smile just seeing it, or makes us relax just holding it, that kind of things.

 

native creative - yellow poppy seed

• I have no defense against yellow flowers: sunflowers, gerberas, autumn sneezeweeds, daffodils or goldenrods, doesn't matter - bananas don't work though, it has to be yellow petals.
• I am always in a good mood when I am riding my bike. Not that I am always smiling around the face but even when I am not feeling too good, I feel better once I'm on the bike. It's the fresh air, the wind, the movement, the muscles working and energy flowing, or all of it, whatever, it works for me.
• I always relax instantly holding a warm cup of coffee in my hands. yeah :-)
• When Mamalita calls, I have no chance holding on to my funk. 

in "music (sing and dance) mode" mood

• The right kind of music does the same thing, it gets in on silent feet and suddenly I feel like singing along and dancing.
• On more thing on the relaxing side of happy is taking a walk in the little forest around the corner. It always slows me down, eases the tension and hurry, and puts me into a more productive frame of mind.
• Last but not least when an idea of mine worked out and I create something beautiful. Doesn't matter what it is: a candle that turned out great, a picture that captured the moment right, a practical and aesthetic solution for a problem at my apartment, the newest knitted hat or leg warmers. Each beautifully finished project makes me proud and really happy.

native creative - recycled candles

 ready to let this go and get on with happy  ˙·٠•● ƸӜƷ ●•٠·˙

Nalini Singh - Rock Addiction Review

before it is too late ...

I had the chance to read Rock Addiction, the first book in Nalini Singh's new series Rock Kiss a little ahead of time. For my first time ever with Nalini, there was  nothing paranormal in it. The story is set in a totally normal world, this totally human here and now Earth world. Well, as normal as a rockstar's life is normal :-)

To get to the point, Nalini just does not dissappoint. Her stories never let me down.

Rock Addiction a Rock Kiss Novel

 This is a ssssss-story, this is one steamy, sweaty, smoking hot story. Even the main persons, Molly and Fox are sssss. Molly is sweet, seclusive and rather shy at first, while Fox is more along sexy, scaldingly hot and smoldering. Both Molly and Fox are scared and scarred but they just don't stand a chance against a voice sexy as sin and smooth as wiskey -  aaaand lots of sparks - like fireworks sssssparks - like 4th of July fireworks SPARKS, yeah that kind of sparks.

All that is left to say: STOP reading and START ROCKING already.

sssso ssssappy ssssad it's over :-(

But .... Rock Courtship is coming end of September and I can't wait. Are Thea and David choosing a letter too? 

My World War 2 Gratitude contribution

before I forget it ...

I finally figured out what that heaviness is about, that covers my life since last week. Well, more like all the pieces finally fell into place. It's a delicate topic: World War 2.
I believe that loosing the World Wars, loosing all the land is a major wound on the Austrian soul. Going from major player on the world stage to tiny looser of the wars, occupied and forced to cower before the others, is so not good for the self-consciousness.

• Honestly, I am grateful that we lost, because we slide under the radar while all major world players are painting bulls' eyes on their countries for retaliation.

• Furthermore I am grateful that we lost, because Austria became neutral and kept its fingers out of any squirmishes and wars ever since.

I just do not believe war and destruction ever create peace. Yes, I want peace on earth, for myself and for everybody who wants it too. My contribution to that goal and wish and so far still dream is for one welcoming that heavy World War energy in my life now instead of pushing it away and ignoring it. It threads through my whole life if I want it or not. For one, I grew up right next to a (no longer visible) Stalag camp and lived in the shadow of that energy even more than others. I recently met more old people talking about how hard it was too.
The only way to create peace that I know of, is to accept and forgive - and be grateful, because it could have been worse.

• I am really grateful that the World Wars are past and that I only live in the echo and shadow of it. It is still heavy enough. 

• I am also grateful for the World War energies to come up now because it is time for them to get a move on. They are really old old energies, and we need the pure male energies twisted up in it for our way forward. 

• And last but not least I am totally grateful for Hitler because I ,for one, definitely did not want his job.

so ready to forget that already

new potentials - new doors - new rooms

before I forget it ...

this new chapter, it's like a new room I am walking into, moving into actually.

I know someone who sees potentials as floating bubbles, some closer as they are more likely, some smaller, same farther away. It is a system in flux. I see it as rooms and doors. Right now I am in a room with doors, some are open, some are closed. The open doors are the possibilities I can choose from. So I decide on a door and walk through into the next room. This new room has doors as well, some might be the same as in the room before but most propably there are new doors to new rooms and new possibilites. Sometimes we don't like any of the open doors or it seems like there are no open doors. So we wait or we try to open a closed door, we push and fight and get angry. Because we want THAT DOOR!

no exit door :-)

I finally got to believe that if the door isn't open now, it isn't time for that door (for whatever reason I can't see yet). I also decided to believe that I can't choose a wrong door. If the door is open, it is good for me. If a possibility shows up in my life, I can safely choose it - end of story. There are no better or worse rooms, just different rooms, different experiences. As I choose a room, I can always un-choose it. I don't have to stay there if I don't like. Our lives are constantly flowing and changing, a system in flux. Nothing is pre-destined.
This pre-destined believe is still very strong here. That you are born with your fixed faith and that you walk down that road with no real power over that road at all. Furthermore it constantly gets worse the farther you travel down that road. You are born a healthy baby full of energy and then you use up that energy, you get sick and sicker, frail and frailer. It always gets worse. Maybe that is why we rather stay in a bad relationship or frustrating job than move on and take a chance with a new possibility. Maybe that is why so many humans stay on the road they started to walk at birth. Because it can only get worse?

Honestly!
What an empowering thought and what a powerful self-fulfilling prophesy!

I lived with that believe just like everyone else I guess, but I found that it isn't the absolute truth and it just doesn't make me happy. So I decided to get off the main road and create new rooms for me, 'a little bit better' room and another 'little bit better' room and another. Even if you can't see it or think it, there always is a door to a room that is more accommodating you as you are. There always is a room serving you better or a little more loving and supportive that the room you are in right now. It only depends on your decision what you want to believe.

Does it always get worse or does it always get better? 

I already know what I want to choose and believe .. hope I'll see you there.

life review - masculine sexual energy

before I forget it ...

a new chapter of my life starts on Monday so I took the rest of the week of to be with myself. It felt like the right time to once again look at my life and review what I want to take with me into this new chapter and what I want to put down before walking through this door into the new room that lays ahead.

• For one, I will undoubtedly take the gratitude practice with me. I will create lots more great news and great little and big changes with it in the new room.
• Furthermore, I will take the DIYing with me. It doesn't really matter what it is, as long as it is a handcrafted creative expression following an idea of mine. 
• Obviously I will take this blog with me. It is still on experimental feet, so we will see where it goes :-)

So, what will I leave behind? There is one major area right now that holds the most old energy and the biggest need for a thorough cleanse and release.

male energy .. to be more precise: masculine sexual energy

I just realized that I accepted masculine sexual energy in every day communication because it has always been there. I has always been like this:

• being stared at with sexual intent
• being undressed with looks by strangers 
• jokes with sexual content below the belt with strangers in puplic or non intimate situations
• exchange of ambiguous phrases and jokes in non intimate situations. 

The parts, that are transboundary and not loving are:

• the sexual energy coming from a stranger or "friend"
• the sexual energy coming in a puplic or non intimate situation

All of the above examples would mean something totally different if they were done by a lover in an intimate situation.

The thing is, I feel like a medieval castle constantly being stormed by a hostile army set on breaking and entering, conquering my empire, running over my kingdom and then pounding on their chests and showing their muscles and strength and screaming: "me tarzan, you jane!" Honestly, humans are not lions! Even in the animal kingdom the females decide and I am not some price to be stolen and owned. What kind of a relationship starts with a male having broken down  my door and forced himself into my castle? ... yeah, the kind I don't want and the kind I release from my life now.

It is time to take back the power over my life and relations and decide myself which kind of masculine sexual energy I invite into my life - and it sure won't be the loudest, noisiest, or "pushiest". 

so ready to forget that already