as I was out walking my forest round's to summer temperatures in November, I realized that some part of me still believes that there is a reward at the end of struggle/suffering/pushing. I really don't want to do this, but if I do it, I will be better of after. The more resistance we have, the more we dislike it, the bigger the pot of gold waiting at the end of it.
Honestly, we should all be rich, swimming in gold like Scrooge McDuck, for how often we manipulate ourselves into doing stuff we totally dislike!
Might be I am blind because I can't see us swimming in gold. I rather see people struggling, suffering, complaining and disliking what they are doing.
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| native creative - struggling and suffering |
I believe we learn early on that this is the way it is done (here on earth).
Whatever we can do easily, doesn't count. Only what we have to work hard to achieve is a real achievement. A goal we can reach easily isn't even worth talking about. That is not a real achievement.
I know things were very easy for me when I was little. As I am trying again to finish my degree right now and struggling with it, I remembered how school was so totally easy for me. I just knew what I had to know. EASY.
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| native creative - easy smiley |
The other thing I connect with easy is lazy. My mother accused me of being lazy because I did not give it enough effort. Now I understand that I went with the flow in ease while she pushed, efforted and struggled. From her perspective easy and lazy might look similar. Apart from that I can see her pot coming closer and it isn't a pot I want. So no reason to travel down the struggling road.
My point is, there can't be a loving reward at the end of struggle. In the worst case we struggle and suffer ourselves to death only to return for more and more ... and more. A road you don't like to walk, a road that doesn't make you feel good walking it, will not bring to you a loving destination.
For me it means returning to my natural state of ease ... If it is easy for me right now, it is good. If it isn't, what awaits me down that road isn't loving and therefore worth it anyway.
