I always felt strong, even though I am a rather elfish and delicately looking human female. I felt so trapped in this weak human body. It can't run. It can't jump. It can't fly. It gets tired soooo fast.
So last week I sat home breathing and meditating and I saw my superhuman strength invite into my life the darkest meanest being!!!! WHAT THE F***??!!
So I investigated that further. My superhuman strength finds that being interesting! ATTRACTIVE! My superhuman strength finds light and love boring and unattractive. It needs adventure! HE IS TOTALLY BORED BEING HUMAN! ...and yes, he is a he. He even watched dispassionately as the tendrils of the dark being (sickness, whatever) ate his body. Superhuman strength does NOT FEEL ANY PAIN!
summary: My superhuman strength wants superhuman adventures, constantly and never ending thrilling superhuman adventures. adrenaline spiking superhuman adventures.
Superhuman adventure is kinda destructive for a human being, mostly for my human body. No, honestly for all of me. I can't keep up with the destruction my superhuman strength's adventures wreck on my body. I haven't even healed one illness when he already invites the next one in. Because he doesn't feel the pain and gets bored, while all the rest of me is wrecked by pain and sickness.
So I went and had a serious discussion, explaining to strength that he is a selfish bastard instead of a good alpha for his pack. He didn't even know that he had a pack and should have been a good alpha, he only saw and thought about himself. It is normal in our world to have strength sitting on the throne and making the decisions. Looking strong, acting strong, not showing any vulnerabilities, end of patriarchy, adrenaline and adventure seeking, .... So I got my strength of my throne for a while. I hope I have a good female leader somewhere in my arsenal that can take over and make good decisions for all of me.
I love my male and I love my superhuman strength, so it wasn't surprising for me that I had mine making the decisions.What I found surprising is, that I know many strong women. What is suprising in a bad way is, that they all struggle. I read once on facebook: "Everybody strong I ever met, had walked a hard road." I should have saved that, it was written in nicer words, but the meaning is the same.
My question: Why do strong people have a hard life?
Does the strength constantly have to proof itself? I am strong enuf? I won't break even under that much pressure, that much lack, that much pain?
Shouldn't strong people be successful? Shouldn't they bloom, flower, sow seeds and expand?
Shouldn't they have it easy?
Pippi is strong too ... is that why she has constant challenges?
Well, at least Pippi doesn't suffer :-)
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| Pippi, the strong (from a card) |
